


Slipping Through My Fingers

by Devils_Official



Series: I Have A Dream [2]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Child Abduction, Domestic Bliss, Graphic Descriptions Of Love, Kidnapping, M/M, Married Couple, Medical Technology, Science Fiction, Soft Space Husbands, Zarkon’s A+ Parenting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-05
Updated: 2019-02-08
Packaged: 2019-10-04 13:49:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 11,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17305748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Devils_Official/pseuds/Devils_Official
Summary: Nearly two hundred years after their wedding, Lotor and Sendak decide to expand their family.





	1. Chapter 1

“Sendak, do you think we’d make good parents?”

Sendak could not honestly say that he was surprised. He’d seen the way Lotor looked at families with children, especially small children, with an almost tangible yearning in his eyes.

But he knew that Lotor was really asking a different question: Did Sendak think  _ Lotor _ would be a good father, given the “role model” he’d had? 

Even now, almost two centuries later, some scars persisted. 

“Yes,” Sendak said, honestly. “Why do you ask?”

He knew why Lotor was asking, but it was usually better to let him bring things up at his own pace; he didn’t like to be rushed or pressed. 

“I’ve… I’ve just been thinking, I suppose. We’ve been married for a while now, and… Everything is going really well, and maybe it’s...time. To think about expanding the size of our...family. If you wanted.”

Sendak had been thinking about it, too, for a while. “What do  _ you _ want, my love?” 

“Well, I think it would be best if we were both onboard with this before we brought a child into our lives. But I- I would like to raise a child. Or maybe several. And they’ve been after me lately about having an heir.”

“This is our decision, not anyone else’s,” Sendak reminded him. 

“I know.” He finally glanced at Sendak. “So. What about you? What do you want, darling?” 

“I would love to raise children with you, my love. As many as you want. I think you’ll be a great father.”

Lotor smiled softly. “Thank you. That means a lot to me.”

Sendak kissed him. “You mean a lot to me.”

* * *

 

It all fell together after that, and about two years after that initial discussion, Sendak watched Lotor pace up and down nervously. 

“Are you sure about this?” Lotor asked, again.

“It’s a little late to back out now, my love,” Sendak said. “They’re expecting us first thing in the morning.”

“What was I thinking! I can’t do this. I’m going to be a terrible father, and she’s going to be so damaged. Do you understand that? She’s got my fucked up genes, Sendak! And let’s not even start on the psychological problems I’m going to give her.”

“It’s going to be alright, Lotor,” Sendak said. “Come here?” 

Lotor did, somewhat reluctantly, and finally Sendak pulled him into his lap. 

“It really is going to be alright, my love,” Sendak continued. “I promise. Everyone is nervous about becoming a parent. It’s normal.”

“Are you nervous?”

“Terrified,” Sendak admitted. “But that’s not what you need right now. So let me be the calm voice of reason. I know you’ve been reading everything about parenting you can get your hands on. You probably know more about raising children than the experts. We’ve set up the nursery. We’ve got everything ready. We’re ready, my love.”

“But what if we’re not?” Lotor whispered. “What if I can’t- My father couldn’t love me; why should I expect to be any different? She deserves loving parents, Sendak!” He pressed his face into Sendak’s shoulder, crying.

Sendak rubbed his back. “You aren’t your father, Lotor. I know you are never going to treat any child the way you were treated, because I know you never want another child to suffer the way you suffered.”

“I don’t,” Lotor whispered. “It wasn’t fair. No child should go through that.”

“And I’ll be here, too. I married you, remember? So we’re in this together. This isn’t something you need to do alone.”

Lotor nodded and took a few deep breaths. “You’re right. I just- I’m just nervous.”

“I know.” Sendak kissed his forehead. “But we’re going to meet our daughter tomorrow.”

Lotor smiled. “We are.” He clung to Sendak for a few more minutes. “I’m not sure I can sleep.”

“No? Is there anything I can do?” 

Lotor pretended to think about it for a moment. “I suppose you could wear me out.”

“I suppose I could do that,” Sendak said. He cupped Lotor’s jaw, pulling him in for a kiss. 

Lotor melted, apparently willing to give himself over completely. He wasn’t always; sometimes he was too distracted to really get into it. Sendak didn’t really mind. It just meant he had to put in a little more work, which always had its own rewards.

But tonight, for now, Lotor was here, in the present. “After all,” Lotor murmured, “we won’t have much time to ourselves once we bring our daughter home. Might as well make the most of it now.”

“It will be worth it,” Sendak said.

Lotor stroked Sendak’s ear. “I know that. But tonight is the last night where it will be just the two of us for some time, and I want to enjoy it.” 

Sendak kissed Lotor again. “And how would you like to do that?”

“Just like this,” Lotor said, shifting a little on his knees. 

Fortunately, they’d already dressed down for bed, and that meant getting undressed was as simple as shrugging off their dressing gowns. 

Lotor leaned up to kiss him some more, grinding down just a little in Sendak’s lap. He still moved as gracefully as he had at twenty-seven or thirty-seven or one-hundred-and-seven, the over two centuries of life he’d endured having no real impact on his body.

“You’re beautiful,” Sendak murmured, when Lotor finally broke the kiss. 

Even after all this time, the praise still affected Lotor. He loved it, and yet had no idea how to accept it. But Sendak didn’t need reciprocation; it was enough that it pleased Lotor.

Lotor reached down with one hand to teasingly stroke Sendak’s cock, his touch light enough to be positively maddening; those beautiful, delicate hands were some of the cruelest torture devices in the known universe. 

“Is everything alright, my darling?” Lotor asked finally, innocently, and it was only then that Sendak realized he’d started growling. Honestly, it was all he could do to stay still. Relatively still; he couldn’t help the tiny jerks of his hips into Lotor’s hand. 

“Just fine,” Sendak gritted.

Lotor laughed and kissed the tip of his nose. Then he lifted himself up on his knees; Sendak placed his hands on his hips to provide a little extra support. 

Lotor used one hand to position Sendak’s cock, and then he sank partially down, stopping just before the first ridge, his chest heaving already. 

“I know what you’re thinking,” he said quietly, breathlessly. “Do it.”

“Are you sure?”

“Do it,” Lotor repeated. “Use me like I know you want to.”

And with Lotor demanding like that, how could Sendak possibly resist? 

Sendak pulled Lotor all the way down on his cock; Lotor didn’t even moan, just let his mouth hang open, his eyes tightly shut.

Sendak knew him well enough by now to know that Lotor was enjoying this immensely, and that he should, under no circumstances, stop. 

It would take some sort of catastrophe to pull him away now. 

Sendak was strong enough that he didn’t really need Lotor to do anything; he could just lift him up as he wanted, and he did, setting the hard, fast pace that left Lotor breathless and satisfied every time. 

Sendak got just as much pleasure from pleasing Lotor as he did from any physical stimulation, so having Lotor so close and so viscerally pleased was ideal. 

“You look so pretty,” Sendak murmured, low and rough. “So perfect, and all mine, my lovely Emperor.”

Lotor came with a sharp cry, his back arching so beautifully. Sendak followed him over, holding Lotor close.

He let Lotor catch his breath, then scooped him up and laid him out on the bed, belly-down.

“What are you doing?” Lotor asked, amused. 

“You wanted me to wear you out,” Sendak said, draping himself over Lotor’s back, so he could kiss the nape of Lotor’s neck, before moving lower. “So that’s what I’m going to do.”

“And how do you plan to-  _ oh _ ,” Lotor began to ask, but his voice dissolved into a breathy gasp as Sendak licked a stripe over his entrance. 

Lotor pushed his hips back as much as Sendak would allow, and that was Sendak’s cue to ramp things up a bit. He lapped and sucked and even bit (very gently), until the only sounds Lotor could make were completely incoherent, until every trace of Sendak’s come was cleaned up, until Lotor cried out again and went completely limp, until he was shivering with overstimulation. 

Even when Sendak pulled away to lie down next to him, Lotor didn’t even move, just tried to catch his breath.

Sendak made sure he was alright before getting up to brush his teeth. By the time he returned, Lotor was sound asleep. Sendak gathered him up in his arms and kissed his cheek before he, too, fell asleep. 


	2. Chapter 2

    Sendak squeezed his hand gently, just firm pressure to reassure. He could do anything, as long as he had Sendak at his side.

    The artificial womb was a small device, compared to the importance it held for so many. For them, right now, in this moment and for the last seven months. A newer technology, yes, but one that was quickly becoming widespread,  and not just within the Empire.

    Their child was small -no more than a few pounds, newborn-sized -and it was difficult to catch a glimpse of her as the technicians did their work, preparing her for the transition from life inside the womb to life outside it.

    But finally, finally, _finally_ , a technician emerged. “Sire. Your Highness.” She had a small bundle in her arms, and that was all Lotor could look at. “Your daughter.”

    Lotor took her from the technician; he was vaguely aware of Sendak speaking in the background, but all his focus was on _his daughter_ , his precious little girl…

    She was awake and calm, blinking up at him with her solid golden eyes, as if she knew already who he was to her. She might, at that; newborns were predisposed to recognize the scent of their parents.

    He traced the lines of her face with one very gentle finger, almost afraid to touch her. She was so small, so fragile… She’d surely fit very neatly into Sendak’s organic hand, and she’d be completely dwarfed by the prosthetic.

    She was covered in downy baby fur, a thin-yet-warm layer she’d lose in a few months as more permanent fur took its place. Assuming she ended up with fur.

    She cooed and gurgled at his touch, her tiny ears wiggling.

    The technician left, and Sendak led him to the sofas Lotor assumed were for this very purpose. He sat, still enraptured by this tiny, adorable creature in his arms.

    “She’s perfect,” Lotor whispered.

    “She is,” Sendak agreed, positioning himself so he could look over Lotor’s shoulder at her. He rubbed his cheek against the side of Lotor’s neck, just as enamoured by their daughter as Lotor was.

    She wriggled free of some of her swaddling, freeing one arm, and she waved it up at them, trying to grasp something. That was instinctual, too, the need to grasp and climb.

    Sendak let her grab one of his fingers; she couldn’t get her whole hand around it. “She’s strong,” he murmured.

    “That’s good,” Lotor said. “She’s healthy. Already off to a good start.”

    Sendak kissed his cheek. “Let’s take her home.”

* * *

 

    Kova greeted them when they returned to their quarters. He didn't, usually, but for a cat he was very perceptive. He wove between Lotor’s legs, chirping for attention.

    Thankfully, Lotor wasn’t carrying the baby currently, so he just scooped Kova up and let him sit on his shoulder. From that vantage point, Kova peered at the baby in Sendak’s arm.

    She was sleeping currently, her tiny ears flicking in response to her dreams.

    Kova leaned forward, almost unbalancing himself, trying to get an even closer look.

    Lotor scratched under his chin. “You’ll get a chance to meet her later,” he told Kova. Kova, apparently understanding, or just getting bored, jumped down and sauntered away.

    Lotor and Sendak gravitated towards the sofa in the front room of their quarters, neither one ready or willing to look away from their daughter. She was just...perfect, and theirs, and…

    Lotor’s heart seemed like it would burst from all the love and joy he felt right now.

    She woke up after a little while, and suddenly Lotor felt a little ridiculous for watching her sleep, but then she started crying…

    “She’s probably hungry,” he said, standing to fetch a bottle. It didn’t take long; they’d set up everything in advance, so they’d have less to worry about now.

    He returned with the bottle, kissing Sendak on the cheek as he sat down.

    Sendak handed him the baby, who was still crying.

    She stopped at the first taste of (synthetic) milk. She nursed messily, getting milk all over herself and Lotor, but Lotor assumed she’d get better at it with time.

    She drained the bottle, drinking at least half of the contents, and Lotor set the bottle aside.

    “Feeling better, Little One?” Lotor cooed, scratching under her chin.

    She gurgled up at him, and Lotor couldn’t resist pressing a kiss to her forehead.

    He looked up to see Sendak watching with such tangible fondness that Lotor flushed.

    “You’re so good with her,” Sendak said, leaning over to kiss his cheek. “Even if you are covered in formula.”

    “I guess we should clean her up. She’ll get cold if we let it sit.”

    “I’ll be right back,” Sendak said.

    He returned a moment later with a warm, wet washcloth, and Lotor wiped the milk away gently.

    She started purring almost immediately, her eyes falling shut and her ears drooping in obvious pleasure; she was asleep before Lotor even finished cleaning her up.

    Lotor had to blink back tears. That purr meant they were doing everything right, that she was safe and happy. He held her a little bit closer, just for a moment, before handing her off to Sendak. “I’m...going to clean myself up,” he said, standing.

    Sendak nodded, giving Lotor a look of understanding. “Take as much time as you need, my love.”

* * *

 

    The wail woke Lotor up immediately. “I’ll get her,” he told Sendak, who had also woken up, quietly. Sendak nodded sleepily, and Lotor kissed his cheek, before climbing out of bed.

    The crib was set up nearby. More and more parents were putting their child’s crib in a different room entirely, even during the first few months, but it seemed so much less convenient, considering the fact that Honerva woke them up at least three times a night.

    Lotor didn’t really mind, as he was used to waking up frequently in the middle of the night anyway. There might as well be a purpose to it, and he could think of no higher purpose than caring for his infant daughter.

    She was already reaching up for him when he leaned down to pick her up, and she quieted almost immediately, just from being held. She only ate about once a night now, and a quick check confirmed that she didn’t need to be changed.

    Which meant she was likely just...lonely.

    Some sources Lotor had consulted preceding his daughter’s birth had informed him that it was best to just let her cry it out.

    Some deep innate memory stirred at that, waves of hopeless loneliness washing over him. He couldn’t remember his own infancy, of course, but… He knew that he’d been left alone quite frequently.

    And he knew that he didn’t want his daughter to feel that sort of despair ever, if he could help it.

    He settled her against his shoulder, rubbing her back the way she liked, which dried her tears instantly.

    “I’m here,” Lotor murmured. “It’s alright, you’re alright.”

    Quietly, he slipped into the room they had set aside for her, for when she was old enough to sleep through the night. One wall was covered, floor-to-ceiling, in panels that could be programmed to show a number of landscape scenes. For now, it simply showed the stars that were outside the ship at this very moment.

    They were sailing next to a vast nebula, the clouds of gas and stardust making the room glow softly.

    He repositioned the baby so she could see it, and she watched raptly, even as he settled in the rocking chair.

    She reached out, towards the images, and Lotor laughed softly. “Will you be my little explorer, then? Do you yearn to touch the stars, always traveling, never settling down, because there’s always something else to see?”

    He felt the same way, sometimes, and perhaps if he could have chosen any life for himself…

    But he was happy here, too, even if it wasn’t the way he’d dreamed life would be when he was young. He bent to kiss her forehead, and rocked them both to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

It was not an uncommon sight to see the Galra Emperor hold court with his infant daughter bouncing on his knee, or clinging to his shoulder as she slept, or climbing the throne in order to pull his hair.

Sendak’s heart was not equipped to handle that. 

Seeing Lotor -his husband, the love of his life -on the throne was bad enough. It took all his self-restraint sometimes just to stay in the same room and not order everyone out so he could fuck Lotor against the throne (not that Lotor would mind; it just wouldn’t be appropriate). 

But seeing Lotor and their daughter together? Adorable. Sickeningly so. Practically gave him heart palpitations. Even after a year. 

He’d probably never get used to it, honestly. 

He watched Lotor finish up the day’s session of open court, waited until everyone filtered out, and then went up to where Lotor was slouching back in the throne. 

“Hello, darling,” Lotor said, smiling tiredly. “How was your day?”

“Not as busy as yours,” Sendak said, leaning down to kiss Lotor on the cheek before picking Honerva up. She cooed and gurgled at him, and giggled as he kissed the top of her head. 

“She has been nothing but mischief all day today,” Lotor said fondly. “Isn’t that right, Sweetheart?”

She giggled some more and tried to pull on Sendak’s ear. He flicked it out of her way -he’d gotten very good at that -and let her cling to his shoulder so he could help Lotor up.

Lotor didn’t need his help, but he took it anyway, before standing on his tiptoes to kiss Sendak on the cheek. 

“Some people can be very stubborn,” Lotor said. “Did you know that?”

“It’s alright, my love; you’re far more stubborn than anyone you met with today.”

“Thanks,” Lotor said drily. 

Lotor’s reach was much longer than Honerva’s, so Sendak couldn’t flick his ear out of his way when he tugged on it. Of course, Lotor was aware of his strength in a way that Honerva wasn’t, and therefore it didn’t hurt. 

“I don’t know about you, darling,” Lotor continued, “but I am famished.”

“I’ve already had dinner delivered to our rooms,” Sendak said.

Lotor smiled. “Ah...what would I do without you?”

“Starve, probably,” Sendak said flippantly. 

Lotor laughed, much of his tiredness falling away, and Sendak’s heart beat that much harder. 

* * *

Sendak tried not to be too irritated, but that was difficult, given that his daughter had decided she absolutely had to climb onto his shoulder and use his ear to teethe. 

It wasn’t painful yet; she’d just started teething, and it would be a few weeks before her needle-sharp baby teeth came in. 

But it was...distracting. 

Lotor came into the study, looking for something, and paused. “Darling,” he said, obviously trying not to laugh, “would you like me to take her?”

“She cries every time I try to get her down,” Sendak said. 

“You have a meeting in fifteen minutes, darling. Were you planning on walking in there like this?” 

“If that’s what it takes,” Sendak said crossly. 

Lotor leaned down to kiss his cheek. “You are both ridiculous,” he said fondly. Then he produced Honerva’s favorite teething toy from one of his pockets. “Let’s try this, hm? Besides, it’s almost time for someone’s nap.”

Honerva let go of Sendak’s ear as soon as she saw the toy -a little purple ring that could be frozen -and grabbed for it. 

Lotor scooped her up and she contentedly chewed on the toy. 

“You’re so good with her,” Sendak said. 

“I’m trying,” Lotor said. Then he looked up from Honerva and studied Sendak for a moment. “You’re good with her, too. Better than I am, sometimes.”

It was difficult for Lotor- he surely had to contend with the constant background noise of “why didn’t my father do this for me?” -but while Sendak wasn’t nervous about most things, he was nervous about this, in a way he’d never been with Lotor. (Not screwing up that had been the most important thing in his life, until now, and he didn’t know what he’d do without Lotor.) 

And...he could never quite figure out  _ why _ . 

“I don’t feel…” Sendak began. “It doesn’t feel that way. I wish…” He trailed off, not entirely sure what he wished for. Just... _ something _ . 

Lotor adjusted his hold on the baby, cradling her against his shoulder with one arm, so he could run his fingers through the fur of Sendak’s crest with his free hand. “Sometimes,” Lotor began quietly, reflectively, “I wish that my mother was here, so I could ask for her advice. I have no idea what kind of mother she would have been, but I… It is nice to pretend that, in another life, I would have had at least one parent I could talk to.” He smiled sadly. “But we have each other, not just ghosts of what could have been.”

Sendak’s parents would have enjoyed having grandchildren, he realized. They’d wanted to give Sendak siblings -he remembered that much-but it hadn’t worked out like that. 

And perhaps there was something about parenthood that made him want to turn to more experienced and trustworthy sources. The people who had raised him and could teach him how to raise his child. 

But he had Lotor, and they could figure this out together. 

“You must miss them,” Lotor said after a moment. “They were good to you, weren’t they?”

“They were,” Sendak said. “And I do. I didn’t think I’d still miss them, after this long. I wasn’t young, exactly, but…”

“They are part of you,” Lotor murmured. “Just as we are part of her.” 

Sendak followed his gaze, to their daughter. “I don’t want to fail her. Or you.”

Lotor glanced up, his eyes wide with shock. “Is that what you are afraid of? You won’t. I know it, my darling. I have faith in you.”

“I-“ It felt, suddenly, like their roles had been reversed. Sendak was usually the one comforting Lotor, not the other way around, and it- It was strange. “I don’t know how to tell you what that means to me.”

Lotor smiled softly. “It’s the truth, darling.” He pressed a soft kiss to the top of Sendak’s head. “Now,” he said, “if you don’t hurry, you’ll be late for your meeting.”

Sendak laughed, just a little. “I’m not sure what I would do without you.” He stood and kissed first Lotor on the cheek, then Honerva. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” 


	4. Chapter 4

Honerva looked up at Lotor, then across the room to Sendak, and then back up at Lotor, as if asking, “Really?” 

In reality, there wasn’t much distance between them. A few paces, at most, but to Honerva, who had yet to take her first steps, the distance must have seemed daunting. 

Still, she was ready. Lotor could feel it. She’d mastered standing, and now it was time for the next step, so to speak. 

“Go on, Sweetheart,” Lotor murmured, “you can do it.”

She looked at him again, frowning. She was a very serious child, most of the time, quiet and thoughtful. 

Lotor kissed the top of her head. “Ready?” He asked. 

Sendak knelt with his arms outstretched, trying to encourage her into taking her first steps. “Come here,” he said, in his most encouraging voice. “Come on, Sweetheart.” 

She picked herself up, finally, and frowned some more, obviously thinking. Slowly, shakily, she picked up one foot, then set it down.

It finally seemed to click in her mind, and she took another step and another and another and-

She wobbled, but before she could go down completely, Sendak caught her and scooped her up. “Good job, Sweetheart,” he cooed, and Lotor felt himself tearing up a little. 

Honerva giggled; she liked being at the center of her parents’ attention.

Lotor got up and sat next to Sendak. “You did it, Sweetheart!” Maybe all this encouragement was a little overboard, but he never wanted her to feel like she wasn’t good  _ enough _ . 

She reached for him and he took her easily from Sendak’s hold, placing her in his lap. Sendak wrapped an arm around Lotor’s shoulders.

“She’s growing up so fast,” Lotor murmured, scratching the place behind her ears she liked so much (coincidentally, the same place Sendak liked) until she began purring. 

“We could always have more children,” Sendak said reasonably. 

“And perhaps we will,” Lotor said. “When she’s a little older.” He laughed softly. “She’ll be running around here in no time, causing mischief and getting into trouble, and that will require our full attention, I think. Isn’t that so, Sweetheart?”

She cooed and gurgled. She’d be talking before much longer, but for now… 

“I love you,” Lotor said quietly. “Both of you. More than words could ever express.” 

Sendak kissed his cheek and nuzzled the side of his neck, as if to say, “We know anyway.” 

* * *

Lotor woke slowly, hazily, to Kova yowling and pawing at his face. “Kova, it’s really fucking early…”

Lotor frowned. His voice didn’t sound quite right, but that was a problem for the morning. Maybe he was coming down with something? In that case, sleep would only help.

He tried to roll over, but his limbs wouldn’t cooperate, like they were too heavy. 

He frowned again. 

Kova was still yowling.

Lotor looked over to where the crib had been; they’d recently moved it into the nursery, since Honerva was old enough to sleep through the night.

There was no way she should have been able to sleep through Kova’s yowling, though. (He was usually very quiet, but he could be loud when he wanted to be.) 

So why didn’t he hear her crying?

Panic dissipated the last of whatever was making his limbs heavy and weak.

Kova led the way to the nursery, then jumped up into the crib.

The empty, cold crib.

“No,” Lotor whispered. 

They had opted for a type of crib where the walls slanted inwards, which prevented Honerva from climbing out, but, since Kova liked to sleep in the crib with her, allowed him to come and go as he pleased.

So she couldn’t have gotten out on her own. It was impossible. 

Kova continued meowing in distress, pacing around the crib, sniffing at the corners, as if calling out for her.

“No, no,  _ no _ ,” Lotor said. This couldn’t be happening. He was the Emperor; he had some of the best security in the empire. No one should have been able to get into their quarters, much less abduct his daughter without either him or Sendak noticing. Honerva didn’t like strangers; she would have made a fuss, or…

__ _ Oh gods.  _

Had they-? 

No, that thought was too terrible to think. She was alright, and they were going to find her and bring her back. She was  _ fine _ . 

He walked back into the bedroom and deliberately hit the panic button, before shaking Sendak awake. 

“Honerva’s gone,” he hissed. “She’s gone, Sendak, wake up!” 

Unsurprisingly, that woke Sendak right up. “What do you mean  _ gone _ ?” 

“I mean that she’s  _ gone _ ,” Lotor said. 

It was at that moment that the guards pounded on the door, and Lotor let them in. “Someone has abducted my daughter,” he said, in the calmest, most collected voice he could muster right then. 

“Probably the same people who killed your door guards, Sire,” the officer said. 

Sendak started cursing. “Lock the ship down, and search it from top to bottom. No one leaves until we have our daughter back.”

“And if they’ve already left, Sir?” The officer asked.

“Then sent someone after them. But my daughter’s safety is the highest priority,” Lotor snapped. 

“Yes, Sire.” 

The officers searched their quarters, looking for clues. All they found was a small canister of gas hidden in one of the vents. It was empty, but it had probably contained some sort of air-borne sedative, which would have allowed the abductors to enter and exit without having to worry about how much noise they or the baby made. 

And, finally, they left, and Lotor sank down onto the edge of the bed, feeling ill. Sendak sat down next to him and put an arm around him. He didn’t say anything, which was probably for the best; what was there to say right now? 

Kova leapt up into his lap, quiet once more.

“We’ll get her back,” Sendak said finally. “We will. I promise, Lotor. One way or another.”

“What if it’s too late?” Lotor whispered. “What if they’ve already-?”

“We don’t know that,” Sendak said. “And until we have something that says otherwise, I’m going to believe that she’s alright.”

Lotor nodded. “I’m just...afraid.”

“I know.” Sendak kissed the top of his head. “I am, too. But we’re doing all that we can do. Worrying isn’t going to help.”

Lotor nodded again, absently petting Kova. “I just want her back.”

“I know.”


	5. Chapter 5

The universe didn’t stop simply because the Galra Princess had been abducted. 

It felt like it should have. Everything should have ground to a halt until they got Honerv back, safe and well.

Lotor was barely keeping himself together; Sendak knew he wasn’t sleeping, mostly because they spent large portions of their nights together on the training deck, trying to...cope, somehow, with this devastating loss.

Every minute she was gone, the likelihood of getting her back alive diminished. Unless it was already too late. 

But the Empire needed them, and for now, they only really had each other. (And Kova, but Kova was a cat.) 

A young, but skilled, Commander was in charge of the investigation, and he was making progress. It just didn’t feel like enough.

It never would be enough, until Sendak had either his daughter in his arms, or her kidnappers at his feet. Or both.

“We’ve searched the flagship from top to bottom,” Commander Kolivan said, in his no-nonsense manner. If Sendak was in a better mood, it would be one of the things he liked about him. “We’ve concluded that the kidnappers took this route, here, from the Imperial Suite, to this hangar bay, before making off with one of the shuttles,” he continued, gesturing at a projection.

“Those aren’t suited for long voyages,” Sendak said.

Kolivan nodded and projected a new map.“We tracked it to this moon, where we found the shuttle abandoned. The moon itself in uninhabited.”

“So it was premeditated.”

“Definitely. We believe they may have reprogrammed a sentry in order to sneak the gas canister into your quarters. I have one of my subordinates looking into it now.”

“And my daughter?”

“We picked up strange energy emissions from the landing site on the moon. We believe it came from the secondary ship. A strange form of quintessence.”

“Quintessence?”

“A strange form. We can track it, though, and within a few hours, we should have the trajectory of the secondary ship.”

Sendak nodded. He didn’t want to get his hopes up, but this… It sounded good, at least. 

“Sir,” Kolivan said. “We found no indications that the princess was at all injured while she was still onboard the flagship. No blood, nothing on the cameras. I don’t mean to- But if the kidnappers wanted to hurt her, they would have done so already.”

“Thank you, Commander.” 

* * *

“Quintessence?” Lotor asked. 

Sendak nodded. “That’s what Kolivan said.”

“A strange form? What did he mean by that?”

“I’m not sure,” Sendak said. 

It was incredibly late, but neither of them were going to sleep until they collapsed from exhaustion, at this point. So the training deck it was, far away from the tragedy that the Imperial Suite reminded them of. 

It was too quiet, without their daughter. Too lifeless, and that felt like an ill omen. 

“I… I need those readings,” Lotor said urgently.

Sendak knew that look, that tone. “What are you thinking?”

Lotor smiled joylessly. “I hope I’m wrong, but I don’t think I am. Who uses and manipulates quintessence, Sendak?” 

Understanding dawned on him, and they stared at each other for a moment, nearly paralyzed with  _ fear _ , before they sprinted out of the training room.

* * *

Lotor had combed through every image they had of the kidnappers himself. They’d been careful to keep their faces turned away from the cameras, which meant they were familiar with the flagship’s layout.

Every single Druid in the Empire had fled with Haggar, after Lotor’s Kral Zera. 

It was, perhaps, a long shot, but…

Sendak knew that Lotor was right. He knew it in his bones. 

“I’m going after her,” Lotor said, quietly, placing his palms flat on the table before him. “That is my daughter, and I will not allow Haggar to-“

“Lotor,” Sendak, just as quietly, but softer. 

“Sire,” Kolivan broke in. “I do not believe that would be...advisable. I believe a small team of my subordinates would more effectively-“

“What!” Lotor yelled. He’d hadn’t slept in a week, and the worry… “Am I a liability?”

“Yes,” Kolivan said very calmly. “Besides, this mission could be dangerous, and you are the Emperor, Sire. We can focus on retrieving your daughter better if we do not also have to worry about your safety.”

Maybe it was Kolivan’s no-nonsense manner, but Lotor slumped back into his seat. “You’re right, Commander. Forgive my outburst. I am under a great deal of strain at the moment.” He buried his face in his hands. “Do what you need to do. Just...get her back. Please.” 

“I’m going,” Sendak said.

Both Lotor and Kolivan glanced at him incredulously.

“Sir, I must object on the same grounds.”

Lotor frowned thoughtfully. “Sendak, darling…”

“I have sufficient field experience,” Sendak said. “I’m better qualified than most of the men in your unit, Commander. And that’s my daughter, too.” 

Lotor mulled it over a moment longer. “Very well. I find myself reassured by the prospect. Just...be sure that you come back, too.” 

“Of course,” Sendak said.

Kolivan wasn’t pleased by the idea, but he didn’t protest. “As you command, Sire. With your permission, we’ll depart within the hour.”

“Vrepit sa, Commander.” 


	6. Chapter 6

Lotor couldn’t stop his hands from straying to various pieces of Sendak’s armor, straightening and adjusting, though of course Sendak was dressed as impeccably as ever. 

“Be careful,” Lotor said quietly, not quite meeting Sendak’s eye. 

“I will be.”

“I can’t- I need you to come back to me,” Lotor whispered, so softly he wasn’t sure Sendak heard at first. “I can’t lose you both.”

“I will return with our daughter,” Sendak reassured, bringing up his hand to stroke Lotor’s cheek.

Lotor leaned into the touch. “See that you do.”

“As you command, Sire.”

Lotor smiled softly, in spite of himself, and stood up on his tiptoes to kiss Sendak on the cheek. Sendak, of course, wasn’t satisfied with only that, and guided Lotor in for a kiss on the lips. 

“I will come back to you,” Sendak said, very seriously. “No matter what it takes.”

Lotor nodded. “Good.”

The final launch announcements were made overhead, but the ship wouldn’t depart without Sendak. 

“Lotor, I’d like you to get some sleep while I’m gone.”

“I’ll try.” And he was tired, but he was more worried about the contents of his dreams, now that he knew who had abducted their daughter. 

Sendak nodded. “Alright. I love you.”

“I love you, too. Good luck, General.” He stepped back, allowing Sendak to board the ship.

He watched until the ship had left the hangar and was out of sight. 

* * *

Lotor did try to sleep, but it was fruitless, despite Kova jumping up onto the bed with him and purring in his most soothing tone. 

Finally, he got up and left the Suite. It was too quiet, too cold, too empty, and he had things to see to.

The mission was only projected to take three days, but anything could go wrong, and…

Worrying about it wasn’t going to help. Instead, he dug up all the of centuries’ old files he’d kept, not because he’d wanted to, but because he’d feared they might become relevant again.

That was the thing about the Druids. They might use a power that science could not yet explain, but they kept meticulous notes in the hopes that one day, they might be able to explain and quantify and categorize. They were scientists, at heart, for all that they lacked faces and ethics and decency.

The thought that they had taken his daughter…

He  had no idea what they might do with her, and he didn’t want to think about it, but his mind could only conjure up dark imaginings based on those old files. 

The witch had once asked for his blood in exchange for the means to save Sendak’s life. What had she done with it? And if she was behind this, then what would he have to do to get his daughter back, if Sendak failed?

(Sendak wouldn’t fail. He couldn’t fail. Lotor needed him to succeed; there was no other acceptable outcome.) 

He’d do anything for his daughter. Absolutely anything. If she asked for his empire… 

Some of these files had been sealed by Zarkon, shortly after Daibazaal’s destruction. 

He wasn’t exactly sure what he was going to find. Maybe nothing, but maybe something that could...help. Give him some clue as to why-

There was nothing about Haggar before the destruction of Daibazaal.

There was nothing about his mother after the destruction. 

It had to be a coincidence. He was just paranoid. If Sendak was here, he’d laugh about how  _ ridiculous _ the idea was-

His mother had been an accomplished alchemist. One of the best of her generation. She’d discovered quintessence, written papers and run experiments and-

Haggar had once led huge research projects, always thirsting for more quintessence, more power, more-

_ No… _

* * *

There was nothing Lotor could do from here, whether the witch was his mother or not (but evidence suggested, hinted, led him to one conclusion…)

There was nothing to suggest that the witch knew, at least, and he couldn’t decide if that was a good thing or not.

On the one hand, if she did know, and she’d been mistreating him anyway…

On the other, if she didn’t… Would she treat her granddaughter, her almost-namesake, better or worse if she knew?

Whatever she’d done to him was in the past, long ago, and he’d triumphed. But now… She’d had his daughter abducted, probably for no good reason (as if there was a good reason to have a child kidnapped)...

And the best he could do for now was hope that Sendak and Kolivan’s team got there before the kidnappers rendezvoused with the witch. 


	7. Chapter 7

SSendak hated being parted from Lotor. It was bearable when it was just for a few hours, or even a day or two, but right now, Lotor was the only one who could help calm the storm of emotions that raged within him.

They’d been apart for much longer periods of time, since their wedding. Months, and even close to a year once. And yet it hadn’t been as bad as this, this interminable waiting, as thoughts whirled around his mind:  _ what if it’s already too late, what if there’s nothing we can do, what if what if what if _

He knew Lotor was probably going through something similar, although he did have the distraction of running the Empire. Though that probably wasn’t enough of a distraction, and he probably felt just as helpless, waiting around on the flagship, waiting for… 

The ship they were taking was running dark, with absolutely no outside communications coming in or going out, to prevent the signals from giving them away to the kidnappers. 

There was little for him to do. Kolivan’s team ran efficiently, and this ship was too small to have a training deck. The day it took to catch up to the kidnappers’ vessel felt like a thousand years.

But the waiting did come to an end. 

“We’ve got the ship on the short-range scanners, Sir,” Kolivan informed him. “In a few minutes, we’ll be able to begin covert docking procedures.”

A euphemism for “landing on the larger ship and cutting a hole in its hull.” 

“And they haven’t spotted us yet?”

“Not as far as we can tell,” Kolivan said. “We’re making the final approach in one of their blindspots.” 

“Good.”

“Sir,” Kolivan said. “When we board, are we taking prisoners?”

“There is only one objective to this mission, Commander,” Sendak replied. “Do what you must.” 

Kolivan inclined his head politely and left to make final preparations. 

* * *

Sendak was the last person aboard the kidnappers’ vessel, and while he hated it, he understood. Gods, he didn’t know what Lotor would do if…

And he really didn’t want to think about that. 

The kidnappers had already been neutralized -Kolivan’s team was highly efficient and lethal - so he had to step over bodies. It didn’t matter. None of that mattered. 

The wail that came from down one of the ship’s corridors was the most beautiful sound he’d ever heard.  _ She was alive. _

She was alive. 

He ran down the corridor, crashing into the room she was in, not caring if anything else awaited him. If something else threatened his daughter, he’d tear their throats out with his teeth, he’d disembowel them, he’d skin them alive, he’d-

She was alone, trying to pull herself out of the makeshift crib she’d been placed in. Some sort of crate; the walls were too high and smooth for her to climb out. 

Her wail was one of frustration, not pain or anger or even hunger. She was just frustrated that she couldn’t reach.

He scooped her up, laughing softly in relief and incredulity and-

She stopped crying immediately, cooing in happiness, the same way she did first thing in the morning. 

Sendak held her close, nuzzling the top of her head, completely unable to stop his tears of relief. “We were so worried about you, Sweetheart, but you’re alright. You’re alright.” Against all odds, perhaps, but she was here, in his arms, unharmed and- and happy and- “Let’s take you home.” 

* * *

First, of course, she was checked out by Kolivan’s medic, which she Did Not Like.

She’d never really liked strangers, but for the most part, she tolerated them as long as they left her alone.

The doctor, Ulaz, did not leave her alone. He did, after all, need to examine her, just to be sure she was alright. 

Sendak did what he could, but she was too old for swaddling to be an effective method of soothing her, and finally they had to settle for having her in Sendak’s lap while the medic checked her out.

That didn’t stop her from biting him when his hand got to close to her mouth.

Her fangs had come in, apparently, and were more than sharp enough to draw blood.

“I am so sorry,” Sendak began. “She doesn’t like strangers.”

“It’s my fault,” Ulaz said. “I don’t work with children very often.”

She hissed at him, a warning, but they finished the exam without further bloodshed. 

“I think she’ll be alright. There are no signs of injury, malnutrition, or dehydration. She might require a bit of extra attention for the next few weeks, but otherwise…” 

“Thank you,” Sendak said, adjusting Honerva so that she could cling to his shoulder. She yawned and started purring, a sign she was likely going to nap.

“Of course, Sir.”


	8. Chapter 8

Lotor glanced up as the doors to the hall swung open, on edge, with his heart in his throat. He’d received Kolivan’s brief, terse message, of course, and today was the day, but everyone wanted to speak to him today, yet every time those doors opened…

It was Sendak this time, though, Honerva clinging to his shoulder and watching everything with her intense golden eyes.

He couldn’t stop himself from leaping up, though one of his ministers had been speaking -about something frivolous, probably - and crossing the expanse of the hall (it had never seemed quite so large) as quickly as possible. 

(His governess would have had something to say about that, but how could he possibly care right now?) 

No force could have stopped him from crying, in that moment. The last...almost two weeks, by this point, had been absolute hell.

Sendak embraced him, held him close. “It’s alright,” he murmured. “It’s alright. She’s alright, we’re alright.”

Lotor nodded. They were, by some miracle. Everything had turned out well ( _ this time _ ), and he had his husband and his daughter to prove it. 

He took Honerva from Sendak, needing to touch, to know that she was alright.

She babbled at him, trying to tug on his hair, just as she always did, like no time had passed at all. 

“Oh, Sweetheart,” Lotor murmured, settling her on one hip, “I did miss you terribly. We were so worried about you, but you’re alright, aren’t you? This was barely an inconvenience for you, wasn’t it? Just a little adventure.”

It could have been so much worse. 

“Commander Kolivan,” he said, pulling himself upright, “you have done me and my family a great service. Thank you for that. Anything you ask for, if it is within my power, will be yours.”

Kolivan blinked. “I-  _ We _ did not do this for the reward, Sire.”

“I am well aware,” Lotor said. “But please, take some time to think on this, discuss it with your men.”

Kolivan inclined his head respectfully.

Lotor continued: “Today’s session is now closed, for I wish to spend time with my family.” No one could fault him for that, not after this. 

* * *

Lotor didn’t want to take his eyes off of Honerva, not just yet. It was too soon, and it felt like, if he looked away for an instant, she’d disappear again. 

So he cuddled up to Sendak, with Honerva between them, as safe as she could be anywhere.

“She bit Kolivan’s medic,” Sendak said.

“Did she?” Lotor asked. “Good girl.” 

She beamed at his approving tone, and Lotor scratched behind her ears until she started purring. While she was thus distracted, he pushed her upper lip back, just enough for him to see the gleam of her brand-new fangs. 

She didn’t particularly like that, but Lotor let her go almost immediately, before she could bite him. “She’s doing so well,” he said.

“She is,” Sendak agreed. “She’ll raise hell one day.”

Lotor laughed, just a little. “But not yet.” He gently pushed her onto her back and reached for her belly.

Her pupils expanded and her ears pricked forward, like a kitten at play. She kicked at the palm of his hand, even as she tried to pull his fingers in so she could bite at them.

“So ferocious,” Sendak said, trying not to laugh. It wasn’t really working. 

He needed to tell Sendak, soon, before it ate at him, but for now… For now, he could just have this. 

* * *

Honerva was sound asleep on his chest when Lotor finally broached the subject. “Sendak,” he began.

“Mm?” 

“While you were away, I did some research. Old files, from before, and I- I found out that my mother might still be alive.”

Sendak frowned. “But you’re...unhappy about it. Why?”

“She has a different name now. A different… identity, I suppose. I doubt she even realizes…”

“Lotor, who is she?”

Lotor shook his head. “It’s Haggar. It’s almost certainly Haggar, that witch, that… How could she do that, Sendak? Even if she didn’t know, wouldn’t there be something to- to let her know? Shouldn’t she have felt  _ something _ for me?” He was trying not to cry -he didn’t want to wake the baby -but it wasn’t really working. 

“Oh, Lotor…” Sendak wrapped an arm around him and held him. “She’s not your mother. Maybe she gave birth to you, but that doesn’t make her your mother. She’s a monster. She’s done things to you, to us, to others that can never be forgiven. And she never once acknowledged you, acted as a mother should… She’s not your mother.”

“You don’t understand,” Lotor whispered. “I came from them. Both of them. Their blood runs in my veins. Look how they turned out. How can I ever expect to- to be good? Am I destined to become a monster like them?”

“Look at what you’ve done,” Sendak murmured. “Look at all the good you’ve done, all the lives you’ve saved and improved. Look at our daughter. Did your father ever do that for you? Did he ever hold you, encourage you, play with you, anything?”

“No,” Lotor whispered. 

“And the witch. Did she ever?”

“No.”

“Then you are already better than them. You are the best man I know. You have so much good in your heart… Most people, I think, would have turned all that pain into anger and hate, but you turned it into love.”

Lotor held Honerva a little tighter, nuzzling the top of her head; she started purring in her sleep. “Thank you, Sendak.” 


	9. Chapter 9

Sendak watched from the doorway as Lotor put the baby down for the evening. He was always so careful with her, especially now, after they’d gotten her back. (He’d also increased security substantially, with Sendak’s input.) 

Kova jumped up into the crib, as he usually did. He liked the baby -they didn’t know if he liked all children, or just theirs, but it didn’t really matter -and often stayed with her while she fell asleep. 

Lotor stood, his back to Sendak and his hands on the crib’s railing, just looking down at her. Thinking, probably, perhaps about how close they’d been to losing her. How lucky they’d been. 

And, finally, he turned away, leaving her to sleep in peace, with Kova and the monitor watching over her. 

He smiled when he realized Sendak had been watching him, and Sendak loved the way his features softened, just a little, the way his eyes lit up, the way he looked genuinely happy to see Sendak. 

“I love watching you with her,” Sendak said quietly. “You’re so good with her. It’s so... _ clear _ that you you love her.”

“I never want her to doubt that she is loved,” Lotor said. “I want her to  _ know _ that she is.”

Sendak hugged him; he seemed like he needed it. “She will.” He held Lotor for a few moments, something that soothed both of them: he liked holding Lotor, and Lotor liked close physical contact with people he trusted. “But now,” he said, once the mood had lightened a little, “I need to make sure you know that you’re loved.” 

He picked Lotor up easily, and Lotor laughed a little. “It has been a while, hasn’t it, darling?”

It had. Between the abduction, trying to raise a teething child, and running an Empire, things had been hectic. Two of those things had not been resolved, exactly, but… Things had settled down once more, and…

Sendak kissed him. 

Lotor kissed back eagerly, even as Sendak carried him to the bedroom. 

He didn’t seem to want to let Sendak go, when Sendak tried to set him down on the bed so they could both undress, and Sendak had to laugh. “My love, it’s going to be very difficult to do all the things I want to do to you if you don’t let me put you down.” 

“That’s your problem,” Lotor said, smirking.

“You can be such a brat sometimes,” Sendak replied, but he finally managed to untangle Lotor’s limbs. 

Lotor reclined back on the bed, watching Sendak undress. “I’d never let anyone else speak to me like that,” he said mildly. 

Sendak kicked off the last of his clothes and climbed over Lotor, pinning him down. “I know,” he growled playfully, nipping at Lotor’s ear. “But someone should.”

“Well, it’s a good thing I love you, then.” 

Sendak kissed him, even as his hands strayed to Lotor’s clothing, methodically undoing the catches from memory. 

When he had Lotor completely bare, he paused, just for a moment, to look. 

Lotor was as beautiful as he’d ever been, lean and strong, with almost delicate proportions. He was less tense than he used to be, a testament to the confidence he now had, and it showed in every line and angle of his body.

“I love you,” Sendak said sincerely, making sure to catch Lotor’s eye. 

Lotor’s expression softened. “I love you, too, my darling.” 

Sendak sat back against the headboard, pulling Lotor into his lap, which was probably one of Lotor’s favorite places, to be honest; Sendak certainly liked having him there.

“It’s been a while,” Lotor reminded him, reaching over to grab the lube. 

“I know. I’ll be careful.” 

Lotor smiled fondly. “You always are.” 

Sendak kissed him again and took the lube from him. “I want to take care of you. I’ll make it good for you.”

“Have I ever said no to that offer?” Lotor asked.

He had not. It still astounded Sendak, sometimes, just how much Lotor trusted him. Even now, Lotor’s trust was hard to earn and easy to lose, and he rarely let people get too close, physically or emotionally.

Sendak (and the baby, but she didn’t really count; it would be difficult for her to betray anyone) was the exception. 

Sendak slicked up the fingers of his flesh hand, watching in amusement as Lotor’s eyes widened. “I think I’m going to make you come at least once before I fuck you,” Sendak said lowly. “Would you like that?”

Lotor bit his lip and nodded, lifting himself up on his knees a little. 

Sendak couldn’t resist kissing him again, even as he slipped his hand down to begin teasingly stroking at Lotor’s entrance. He adored the breathy little moans Lotor made, and Sendak swallowed them up, far more intoxicating than any liquor. 

Lotor broke the kiss when Sendak slipped the first finger inside, inhaling sharply, then sighing in pleasure. 

“So good for me,” Sendak murmured, bending down slightly to mouth at Lotor’s neck. “You never yield for anyone else. Only I get to see you like this. So strong, so dignified, and yet…” 

He added another finger, and Lotor moaned, his head thrown back, exposing the long column of his elegant neck. 

“...and yet so easy to take apart,” Sendak continued. He enjoyed having Lotor fall apart like this in his lap, loved having that sort of power and privilege. It was fun and incredibly arousing to make him writhe like this, trying to push back against Sendak’s fingers, always looking for  _ more _ . (He wasn’t going to get very far; Sendak’s prosthetic held his hips immobile.) 

Sendak knew exactly what he was doing -he’d had a lot of practice -and it didn’t take long for him to get Lotor right to the edge. “That’s it, that’s it, let me see you come.”

Lotor did, biting his lip, his entire body tensing and shaking, his brow pinched in pleasure. 

He was beautiful like that, lost in his own pleasure, without a care in the universe. 

Sendak let him catch his breath, but he was still sensitive when Sendak pulled him down onto his cock. Not that Lotor minded. He liked being pushed to his limits, as long as it was Sendak doing the pushing. 

He even had the wherewithal to roll his hips to meet Sendak’s thrusts, using his grip on Sendak’s shoulders for balance and leverage. 

“So good for me, my love,” Sendak murmured. He pulled Lotor closer -always closer; even the barest inch between them was too much -and they held each other, making love, moving in sync.

There was no frantic rush for completion. When they came, they came together, a breathless inevitability. 

Even then, they did not part. 

“I love you,” Lotor said quietly, rubbing his cheek against Sendak’s shoulder. “I would be lost without you.”

“And I, without you.”

Lotor smiled softly, unguardedly, the afterglow relaxing him more than any reassurance ever could. “It’s late,” he said with a yawn.

Sendak kissed him. “You didn’t sleep while I was gone, did you?”

“Not for lack of trying,” Lotor said, “but no, not really.”

Sendak shook his head fondly; he’d known that would happen. “Go to sleep, my love. I’ll be right here.” He rearranged them so they were laying down, Lotor’s back pressed against his chest; they were asleep in a matter of minutes.

 

* * *

“I want to thank you again for what you have done for us, Commander,” Lotor said.

“It was only my duty, Sire,” Kolivan demurred, bowing his head politely. “My men and I cannot accept anything from you, for merely doing as we were commanded.”

“You’ve discussed it, then,” Lotor said.

“Of course, Sire, but we cannot-“

“What about a new assignment?” Lotor asked. “You’ve assembled an efficient and well-trained team; your skills would be lost within the normal rank-and-file. The Prince Consort and I have discussed it, and we think you should have your own command, with two main objectives: Firstly, to look after the safety of my family. I cannot be the Emperor I want to be if I cannot be assured that no harm will come to my husband and our children.”

“It would be an honor, Sire,” Kolivan said.

Lotor nodded and continued: “Secondly, you would also undertake tasks that normal military forces would struggle to accomplish. Covert operations and other things that would need to be handled delicately.”

“Spies, you mean,” Kolivan said, then added, belatedly, “Sire.” 

“Primarily, yes,” Lotor conceded. “But I would like to know about everything that’s happening out there, not just with the witch, although she will one day become our top priority, but with...everything. I have ambassadors, and while they are useful, they do not see what the average person sees. Wherever I go, I am the Galra Emperor. Your men, on the other hand…”

“This is… a huge responsibility, Sire.”

“Of course it is, but we believe that you are up for the task. Young, but not as young as I was when I became Emperor.”

“Can I choose my team, Sire?”

“Of course. You may have your pick.” Lotor smiled slyly. “I hope that means you accept?”

“Yes, Sire. I will not fail you.”

“I expect nothing less, Commander.” 

After Kolivan left, Sendak pushed off the wall, coming to sit over next to Lotor.

“Why do you always come to my private meetings if you’re not going to say anything?” Lotor asked.

“Observation and intimidation,” Sendak replied. 

Lotor rolled his eyes. 

“There was nothing I needed to say,” Sendak added. “You handled it.”

Lotor smiled and leaned against Sendak’s side. “I hope I’ve made the right decision here.”

“I know that you expect to be betrayed constantly, my love, but you… You’ve managed to gain something that Zarkon never had. They don’t  _ fear _ you, because they don’t need to. You’ve earned their respect, and not just that, but their love, too, and that’s far more valuable.”

Lotor stilled completely. “They love me?” He asked, quietly.

“My gods, Lotor, there is not a single person in the Empire who would not lay down their life for you, not because they fear the consequences if they don’t, but because they want you to continue the work that you’re doing. It is an honor to fight for you, and it is an honor to be by your side.”

“I could not ask them to lay down their lives for me, unless it was necessary,” Lotor said. 

“That’s one of the reasons they love you. They know that you will not throw their lives away on power-hungry expansions that benefit only you. Everything you do, you do for the good of the Empire as a whole. You have made so many lives better, and they see that. They see how good you are.”

Lotor hugged Sendak tightly. “Thank you. I need to hear that, sometimes.”

Sendak hugged him back. “Anything for you, my love.”


	10. Chapter 10

A small hand tugging on his sleeve woke Lotor up. 

Huge golden eyes glowed in the dark. 

“What is it, Sweetheart?” Lotor asked, picking Honerva up and rearranging them so that she was in his lap. 

“I had a bad dream,” she said.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Lotor asked, reaching over to the bedside table for a tissue to wipe her face. 

She shook her head, so Lotor didn’t press her. “Alright, well. It’s very late. How about you have a drink of water, and then we’ll see about getting you back to bed?”

He helped her with the glass.

“Baba?”

“Yes, Sweetheart?”

“You and Papa aren’t going anywhere, right? You’re not gonna leave me?”

“Oh, Sweetheart…” Lotor set the glass back on the bedside table. “Is that what your dream was about?”

She sniffed and nodded. 

“We’re not going anywhere,” Lotor reassured, pulling her into a hug. “I promise. We will always be here for you, no matter what.”

She sniffed again, burying her face against his chest. 

“How about...you sleep here tonight?” Lotor asked conspiratorially. It wasn’t actually a big deal -she usually slept in their bed after she had a bad dream -but she liked the thrill of “breaking the rules”. “Just this once.”

She smiled. “Ok, Baba.”

He tucked her in between Sendak and himself, in the middle, where she’d feel safest, before kissing her forehead. “Go back to sleep now, Sweetheart.”

She snuggled up a little closer and drifted off peacefully. 

* * *

 

Lotor watched the final launch preparations being made, with Sendak at his side and the new baby in his arms. Their middle child, Yorak, held Sendak’s hand, to keep him from wandering off. Like his sister, he was a curious child and prone to getting into trouble, and the hangar was the last place Lotor wanted to lose track of him.

“She’ll be alright,” Sendak said quietly.

“I know,” Lotor said. And he did; it was just… Honerva would always be his little girl. “I just worry.”

Sendak kissed the top of his head, and Yorak undoubtedly made a face; he was eight. 

“Frankly,” Sendak continued, “I’d worry more about anyone who decides to cross her.”

Given that Honerva had received training from both of her parents, and Kolivan personally, that was a fair assessment. She’d grown up into a very nice young lady, but that didn’t mean she put up with anything. 

“Still. Anything could happen out there,” Lotor said. 

“She’ll be careful, and she’s a smart girl. She’ll be fine, Lotor.”

“I know.” 

“Baba?”

“Yes, my star?” Lotor answered, looking down at Yorak.

“Can I go with ‘Nerva?”

“When you’re older,” Lotor and Sendak said at the same time. They exchanged glances, and Lotor continued: “And you’ll have to study really hard.”

It had not been a problem with any of the children so far; they all liked learning. Even the baby, nine-month-old Kaltor, was flying past his developmental milestones. 

“What will I have to study?”

“Engineering, astronautics, physics,”  Lotor said, “to start with. And you’ll have to learn piloting.”

Which would not be a problem either; he was fascinated with flying, hence why Sendak was holding his hand right now. 

“When can we start?” Yorak asked, bouncing up and down on his toes. 

“Soon,” Lotor promised. 

Honerva came over then, her eyes glowing with excitement. “I’m almost ready for launch,” she said. “They’re just loading the last few things.” 

She hadn’t decided how long she was going to be gone yet, or even where she was going, too overtaken with wanderlust to make concrete plans.

Lotor envied her a little, but he couldn’t have been prouder, either. “Be safe,” Lotor said. “If you run into any trouble, just- call us, alright?”

“Call us anyway,” Sendak said. “Let us know you’re alright.”

She rolled her eyes fondly. “Yes, Papa.” She hugged him, then knelt down in front of Yorak. “Hey, in a few years, when you’re older, maybe you could come and be my co-pilot?”

Yorak’s eyes lit up. “Really?”

“Yeah, but first you have to get tall enough to see over the console,” she teased.

He scowled, but he wasn’t really upset. “Yeah, well-“

She ruffled his crest. “I’ll bring you back some souvenirs, alright?”

That mollified him. She hugged him, then stood. 

“Baba?”

“I’m proud of you, Sweetheart,” Lotor said, trying not to choke on his tears. “I know you’ll be alright out there, but I- I worry.”

She was only two years younger than Lotor had been when he’d been exiled, and she was an adult, and she could handle herself, but...

“So be careful,” he finished. He shifted the baby, so he could hug her.

She hugged back. “I will be, Baba. I’ll have to come back, so I can tell you about all the things I’ve seen, right?”

“That’s right.” He kissed her forehead. 

She bent down to kiss the top of the baby’s head; he was asleep, and wasn’t likely to remember this anyway. “Alright. I will be back, so I won’t say good-bye. Just… Until I return.”

“We’ll be here,” Sendak promised. 

She smiled and turned towards the ship. This had been her dream since she was old enough to articulate it. Lotor had been right; she was an explorer, and she’d never rest until she’d seen all there was to see. 

She paused on the ramp, turning to look back and wave, and then she was gone.

They watched until the ship left the hangar and was out of sight. 

“It was worth everything,” Lotor said softly, “if it means this is the life my children can have. I’d do it all over again, a thousand times - _ a million times _ \- just so they can be happy and loved.”

Sendak put an arm around his waist, to pull him a little closer, and kissed the top of his head again. “I’d do anything for the four of you,” he agreed. 

And then Kaltor woke and started fussing, reminding them that they couldn’t stand around in the hangar all day. 

“Alright, let’s go,” Lotor said. “It’s time for someone’s nap, I believe.”

Yorak pouted, as he always did, and-

And everything was alright. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope y’all enjoyed this! There will be a part 3 at some point, with actual plot. In the meantime, I’ll be working on other stuff

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, I am going to continue using titles of ABBA songs for this series.


End file.
